What is Love?

Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more
Baby, don't hurt me
Don't hurt me no more.

What is love?!

Okay! Now that the soundtrack to this blog post is stuck in your head- let's continue!

 

I'm one of those hopeless romantics that truly believes love is what makes the world go round ((yeah, yeah... I get the gist, physicist.. angular momentum is a tiiiiny part of that too))

 

It's not something you can define, but something you feel. But as you know, I'm big on words...

 

Love fascinates me, intrigues me. It's not something you can define, but something you feel. But as you know, I'm big on words, so I thought- "What is love?" ((queue the soundtrack in your head again, you're welcome! ;))  Or rather, "How would you define love in words?" 

 

I asked a number of people to define love in 1-2 sentences, so without further adieu:  

 

 "Love is bacon."

Age 45

 

 "Love is being nice and kissing each other."

Age 8 

"Love is Blind, love is different in every relationship, love is what you make of it, when you are away from the person you're in a relationship with and your heart tingles that's love..

Love is when I'm too sick to wipe my own nose or ass!"

Age 42 

 

"Love is...what makes the world go round. It makes the ride worth it."

Age 26

"Selfless, vulnerable Love in the raw is terribly scandalous. It does not make logical sense... much like God Himself. They cannot be separated."

Age 22 

"If you love someone you will be or do anything for them....  What comes to mind is The Notebook, "If you're a bird, I'm a bird."

Age 32 

"Love is destructive beauty. It's eternal and never dies and could make or break you."

Age 17

"Love is inconsistent. It endures only through unconditional commitment."

Age 22

"The best and only definition of love is 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Age 23

"Love is unbreakable and spans all space and time. It is unbiased and the most powerful thing in existence. Love is infinite."

Age 22 

"This is from a website I read once, "Love is like pushing a button and getting a cookie every time, but eventually you only get a cookie one in every 100 pushes, the other 99 times you get pooped on by a bird, but you still push the button waiting for that one time you get a cookie."

Age 23

"Love is light, love is warmth and kindness, love is honesty and truth.  Love is capable, love is worth, love is never immediate.  Love will always be eternal."

Age 34 

"Love is the chemical reaction in our brains that triggers an emotional response with a physical action to show we care about someone or something."

Age 23 

"Love is an act of expression. 

It means nothing if you don't show it."

Age 33

"To me love is caring. It's being willing to go to the ends of the earth for someone else's well being.  Love is meeting in the middle,  and not always getting your way. It's respect. It's trust. It's friendship and family. It's listening with an open mind and heart,  and being a shoulder to cry on at 2am when needed. Without love the world would shatter in isolation."

Age 20 

"Love is being able to trust and depend on another person without reservation. I also think love is a warmth- a "spark" in my heart when I see the other person coming to be with me. Love means listening carefully to the other person."

Age 89 

 

How would YOU define love? Shoot me a message or leave a comment below! I always LOVE hearing from you! 

 

...man, I love LOVE.

How do YOU define love?

 

 

 

A Gentle Giant I call "Bro."

My brother. We used to be pretty distant, not really close at all actually. We would see each other at family functions and here and there send a text, but we drifted apart for quite some time. As kids, you fight to keep your siblings twenty feet away from you and your stuff at all times.... You take advantage of being in the same house together, eating together, and seeing each other every day after school and every weekend. And then you grow up. As adults, building relationships or keeping them alive can often end up a challenge in this busy world we live in.

Recently we have been talking and hanging out, and I have so much respect for him. Ashamedly, I can't say I always did. Not that I disrespected him, or disliked him, he just wasn't in my life to any capacity for me to form any sort of valid opinion. I knew I loved him and he was my brother; my family. But now, more than ever, I know the bond between a brother and sister can be one to fill many voids in a heart.

My brother is a gentle giant. No, legitimately- he hovers at 6'4" with a whopping shoe size of 14. He can palm a bowling ball like it's a piece of bubblegum.

Although he fulfills so many roles in my life right now, I also have to remember my role. To lift him up when he is down. To crack a smile when he is heartbroken. To pretend like I know what he is talking about when he speaks in a foreign language called "sports." To remind him that any girl would truly, truly be so lucky to have him in their life. To teach him the impact he has on me, my older sister, and my younger sister. To pay attention to his endless knowledge on tiny houses and cars. To read the books he recommends and open my eyes to the insight he has shown me. To laugh with him about stupid inside jokes. To give him a hard time and a kick in the ass when he is being lazy. To annoy him so his worst complaint is that I talk too much.

To just be there for him. Like he is for me.

You see, girls are always saying that "guys suck," and sometimes when I have hurt feelings I have felt the same way. But he has shown me, and reminded me, that not all guys suck. Some of them are great big brothers who any girl would be lucky to have. So remember that as you go through this crazy, hectic thing called life- Don't settle, bro. Know what you bring to the table, because I can see it from where I stand.

Through the years we may drift apart, but I will always cherish and look forward to the days we grow closer.

I love you big bro. I may not always say it, but thank you for being my brother.

Thanks for building tree forts with me. Thanks for ripping the heads off my barbies so I learned how to be crafty. Thanks for switching chores so I didn't have to empty the dishwasher. Thanks for going on hikes with me. Thanks for saying "a pack-pack and a kwof kwof" so every time I use a back pack or a wash cloth I giggle. Thanks for singing hickory dickory dock the mouse ran up the clock in a really epic way. Thanks for eating ten pounds of candy with me while we watch Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Thanks for giving me unbiased advice. Thanks for letting me vent. Thanks for giving me a dead leg when I least expect it so I get quicker reflexes. Thanks for all the memories we have had together so far, and all the memories we have left.

 

To everybody who has a brother, remember to never take them for granted. You may think you are total opposites, but you also may be completely wrong. Family is forever; build the relationships that will be there in the end.

The older I get, the more I see how blessed I am to call my family mine.

Even if relationships seem distant and severed, take a leap of faith and make a phone call. Who knows? Your best friend or family may be on the other end of the line waiting for you to come back in their life.

I Dare You To Try.

People always say live for the moments that you can't put into words.

I challenge you to find words for those moments. 

I dare you to take those speechless, powerful, life-changing moments and search for words. Describe the smile on your face, the sweet smell surrounding you, the way your heartbeat mimicked that of a hummingbird. I dare you to break out of the chains that hold you down in your weakest moments. To describe the way his knuckles went white and his grip suffocating.

Writing is healing. Writing is remembering. 

So for those moments you couldn't find words to describe your pure bliss, I dare you to try. It's a memory worth the books. When you find the right words for an experience like that, you've unlocked the power to relive that moment no matter where you are at, no matter how many years down the road. 

As for the moments you would rather push so deep inside you that they will never be able to escape; I dare you to let them. Sit down with your pen and just bleed. But only do this on one condition- promise once you are done you will leave it on that piece of paper. You will let that memory live on that page, forever. You won't bury it beneath every possible layer you can in your heart, you will unpack that memory from your heart and build it a new home on paper. 

Writing can hurt, or it can heal. It can make you laugh uncontrollably or it can make you weep. 

I challenge you to find words when words fail you. 

I dare you to remember your happiest moments,

and build a home on paper for your worst ones. 

 



Rate and Date

Why are we doing all this 'rate and date' stuff shit? Yes, it's shit. ((geez, I hate cussing.))

...okay I'm back from washing my mouth out with soap...

I've watched so many tiny girls post YouTube videos rating guys from 1-10, tagging them in a post, and giving one thing that they have to tell the truth about. I've watched guys do it too... A lot of guys.

Looks a little like this:
SPOILER ALERT: Reading this entire post may cause you to lower your IQ, or question the IQ of others. This happens in real life my friends. Soak it in.

Initial Post:
"LMS for a rate and tbh"
Response back:
Rate-9
date- nawww
Crush- maybeee
tbh- I told my friends we were dating when we were just talking because I thought you were cute

Where do I start?

• Should I talk about how demeaning it is to RATE somebody on a scale of 1-10?
• Should I talk about how shallow it is?
• Should I talk about how tacky it is?

Because it is all of those....Demeaning, shallow, and tacky.

It takes twelve seconds to formulate your entire opinion of someone in your mind when first meeting them. That being said, we are naturally, and easily, extremely judgmental people. A trait that once kept us safe from harm and life-threatening situations has now transpired into a full-fledged game of indirect bullying. You may think it is cute, flirty, and gets you attention. One of these things you would be correct, it certainly gets you attention; the wrong kind of attention, but attention nonetheless. If you are able to tag & rate 30 different guys/girls, you most likely don't have any real depth to any ONE of those relationships. So yes, you do get a few seconds when you cross someone's mind so they can join in on this game, but in the end, someone who is willing to put any NUMBER as your VALUE in their LIFE is not a friend you want to stick around for long, or start a relationship with.

Second, if someone rates you anywhere below a perfect ten, you get hurt feelings. Womp womp woooomp. You are officially cyber-bullying and/or BEING cyber-bullied. 

Also, starting conversations with the word "Confession" plastered in front is unnecessary. If you have to advertise that you are about to be honest for about five seconds and say what's truly on your mind, I worry about what the rest of your words encompass.  How about being honest and 'confessing' what is truly on your mind all of the time and see where it gets you....

"Confession: I think you're really fun to talk to."

No. Why do you even have to preface that with a big bold CONFESSION right in front?

Try talking with intention, or better yet, dating with intention.

"You're really fun to talk to, I'd like to take you out to dinner sometime, just get to know you a little better?"

Why is society telling us constantly it's not okay to know WHAT we want, and if we do, we are supposed to follow all these little dating rules. Stop with the pick up lines. Stop with the "confession alert" right before you say something sincere, stop rating and tagging thirty guys/girls in a post to get some attention.

Build some real relationships that will last. {{I mean yes, the video you just put on the internet will last... Forever, because again, you put it on the internet, but that's not the forever I'm talking about}}

I know I sound like a grandma that grew up walking uphill both ways to and from school carrying a cello in one hand and a bag full of books in the other, but I'm actually just a regular girl who's 22 and tired of seeing this onslaught of posts in my feed from people who are MUCH too old to be worrying about a 'rate and date' number and secret confessions. (Which to me, anywhere past middle school and it is WAY past time to move on from this) Time to focus on what's important... You know, the new Marvel movie "Guardians of the Galaxy" coming out! .... Okay kidding about the movie ((I'm not kidding))

Things like a home, a wife/husband, a job/career, your education, building relationships that will last a lifetime, not just a YouTube sensation.

For all those participating in the current "rate and date" and "confessions" cool thing to do... This may be the right time to reevaluate what the words rate and date mean.

Rate: What you should be worried about getting the best of on your car insurance, credit cards, mortgage, etc.
Date: What you should do to get to know someone instead of tagging them in a youtube video, FB status, or Twitter message.
TBH: I actually worry about the people I see doing this; like.. I have probably lost sleep over it. And by probably I mean I have. 

Sincerely,
The Girl Who is Not Cooler Than the Flip Side of Your Pillow

The Heart Broken Heal Broken Hearts

I woke up this morning and couldn't help but smell the faint smell of a campfire, or rather, a wild fire. It instantly reminded me of the two Colorado fires I have been witness to, the Waldo Canyon Fire and the Black Forest Fire. One of them I watched flicker down the mountainside from my place of work until I drove home in an overheating car, and the other burnt down my childhood home and the homes of friends and families that I've known since preschool. Both experiences have tested and challenged me along with everyone I know; we all had different experiences. I'm not sharing how the natural disaster 'went down' for me, though. The point is not how much tragedy those fires caused, but how much camaraderie.

 

I woke up to the smell of fire and instead of instantly shifting my thoughts towards the hurt and sadness hundreds and hundreds of people are still experiencing, I thought of when I went to Village Inn when the fire was still roaring across those pine tree filled fields. This breakfast being actually one of my sweeter, most cherished memories.

 Nothing spectacular happened. I didn't meet anyone famous, I still had to pay for my own breakfast, all the calories I ate still counted, and I still sat in the same booth I always do. The thing that made this nonchalant trip to breakfast so good was the people surrounding me.

It was an experience that I've never seen before, and it makes me sad today to think that the only time we experience this is when a tragedy happens. Everyone was so concerned, so caring; everyone would open the door for the next person, they would smile when you passed them, they would hold a conversation with you although they didn't know you. The waitresses and waiters were treated with respect and thanked for their food and service. Many people were paying for other people's breakfasts simply because they knew how hard of a time they were going through.

People went out of their way to show kindness, in so many beautiful ways.

 

 

 Now if you read my blog often, you know I never show emotion; ever. Okay.... Kidding! I'm one of the most emotional people you will probably ever come across ;) But this time, it wasn't just me who thought this was so touching. You could see everyone's spirits be uplifted. You could feel the "togetherness" that we all shared, sitting in the little Village Inn that we've memorized which booth and waitress we like best. This time was different, and it's never been the same since.

Why?

 Why is it that tragedy can bring a group of people so strongly together, and once tragedy is gone, we are back to minding our own, not smiling at others, not paying for people's meals 'just because,' etc.

What I realized is that when the natural disaster happened, people KNEW without a shadow of doubt that others were in need. We could assume that even if your house was not currently on fire, your state was and even many that you knew. The heartbroken were helping heal broken hearts. But why is any other day now different?

We may not all be experiencing the same tragedy, but I can guarantee we are ALL still experiencing tragedy.

 

 I dream of the day mundane things like breakfast at Village Inn become memories we cherish because of the kindness of people; of strangers. I dream of the day people show kindness, openness, genuine concern, and giving attitudes every day, because it is every day that tragedies happen individually.

The fires may be put out, and the homes may be being rebuilt, but that doesn't mean it's time to hang up our hats on showing kindness and becoming one community.

With Love,

PhotoSoulSarah

Beauty.

You know what's been really on my heart lately? 

Beauty.

What people have come to define it as, what WOMEN are defining it as to their daughters, step-daughters, sisters, cousins, friends... 

Beauty is in a woman's strength. Beauty is in a woman's unique IMperfections.

It's not in the shade of lipgloss, the size of her waist, or the straightness of her teeth. 

We live in a viral world where a 'selfie' dictates your image. I may get dolled up for a photo shoot or to go out, but I am beautiful with my crooked teeth, my chipped nail polish, my hair out of place, my no curves, and no make up at all. 

Beauty is within... Not within a selfie. 

As women, our SELF image is constantly on display to younger girls. I challenge the strong women in my life to look in the mirror and ADMIRE the body and face you are blessed with instead of picking it apart. Set the standard for a generation of strong, happy, HEALTHY.... BEAUTIFUL women-to-be: on the INSIDE and OUT. 

Women, there are impressionable, self-conscious and FRAGILE little girls out there looking to you to show them how to view themselves- Let's make sure they look in the mirror and smile a REAL smile, and reflect true beauty. 

And women, believe you are beautiful yourself- not just for them. 

Useless Information That May Become Useful While Doing Something Useless

AKA-- Things You May Not Know About ME.

Let's jump right in...

 

1. When I see a penny faced heads down, I flip it over to change someone else's luck.
2. I want to be able to do the splits with ease. 
3. When I blow out the candles on my birthday cake, I say a prayer instead of make a wish... Seems to be more effective! 
4. I love anklets and toe rings. 
5. One of the highest things I value in life is my education.
6. I have an iPhone, and I'm in love with the OlloClip accessory for macro shots. 
7. I love my family and would do anything for them. 
8. I love chocolate chip waffles that are drenched in syrup.
9. No matter how old I get, there will always be a giant soft spot in my heart for stuffed animals. 
10. I really dislike driving cars.
11. Classical violin music reminds me of home, of my childhood, of all things comfortable and sweet and good. It puts my heart at ease.
12. I miss the adventures my best friend Rebeka and I used to go on. She is full of life. She's always shown me how to be brave and bold; but yet always had one of the kindest, gentle, loving hearts. 
13. I could eat Popsicles like there's no tomorrow. 
14. I love lists. 
15. I hate cleaning; I would rather shovel out ten barns before I empty a dishwasher. No, seriously. I used to trade chores with my brother, he would do my inside ones and I would do his outside ones. 
16. Some days I think I'm not cut out to be an "adult" and then other days I think I am right where I was always meant to be. 
17. I have a newly found love of sci-fi movies; partly because of my favorite person I watch them with {okay, that's 90% of it} and partly because of the thought-provoking nature they hold. 
18. I love writing a blog and I love reading other blogs. I love all things blogg-y. 

PhotoSoul Sarah.

A Love Letter to my Little Sis

Dear sis,

"You don't judge me when I'm weird. You don't judge me when I'm sad."

 

               We’ve always had this unique relationship; half the time the waitress used to ask me if I would like a high chair and a kids menu thinking you were mine. I am 14 years older than you, but you still say we are twins. ((I haven’t broken the news to you yet, although I think you’re on to something)) Okay, we’re not twins. There it is. I’m 22 and you are 8. You’re the best little sister I can ever imagine though. And at times I will probably act more like a mom, and you will get mad, but that’s only because I care about you and your well-being. I’ve always thought it was my job to be a perfect role-model for you. To help you and teach you and show you how to navigate in this messy, unforgiving world we live in. Usually though, you’re the one who teaches me things. You show me the laughter and excitement about the world. The way practice and motivation really does make perfection. You’ve shown me how to love with no reservations. You’ve shown me how to be a role model. You’ve shown me how to make really awesome bracelets, and also how to reorganize a doll house. You’ve shown me patience and understanding. You don’t judge me when I’m weird. You don’t judge me when I’m sad. You’re blunt when I’m being mean, and it allows me to grow and change. You’re kind and generous and light up a room just by being you. You teach me how to ride a RipStick, and induct me into your RipStick club. You teach me the power of giving.

"You teach me the power of giving."

               There will come a time when you don’t feel so awesome though. When you feel like it’s not okay to be weird, when you feel like your body is just not right. When you feel like you need to change for a boy, or change for your so-called friends. And I’ll be right there next to you, telling you the same thing I am today. You’re so special and unique. You have a passion and fire for life that is going to take you wherever you want. You are so strong; stronger than you will ever know.  And when you don’t feel like it, just come over or call me, because I will always, no matter what, see you as a bright-eyed, happy, strong, perfect girl who deserves the world.

"You're bold and brave, strong and passionate."

               Your beauty flows from the inside out. You told me the other day that you were going to grow your hair out until you were my age (which in your eyes, probably like an eternity) and then donate it to people who don’t have any hair. You’re eight now and already have a heart for those who struggle and are forgotten. You have eyes that see people hurt and you help them, and comfort them. When I’m sad you comfort me, and when I’m happy you share my happiness.

               I hope that you never get too cool for me. I hope that whatever life throws at us, we never grow apart. I hope that when you’re in trouble you will call me, and I will bail you out of it. I hope that we share secrets always. I hope that your singing voice is shared with the world and your dancing will move people to their feet. I hope you find health and happiness in everything you do; but when you don’t, try to think of yourself through my eyes.

What can I say? You’re more important to people than you may ever realize. One day, we will be those two old crazy ladies doing the cup song in the park. We will sing with the windows open at stop lights, paint our nails to match each other, and wear ridiculous outfits just to cackle our heads off.

               I see you growing into this beautiful, spunky, energetic, loving little girl, and I am so proud to be your sister.

You really are something else.

               You’re bold and brave, strong and passionate. My number one fan, and my toughest critic. And with only 8 years down, I’d say we have a lot more adventures to go on together… I’ll never be able to teach you everything about life, I’m still learning myself, but I thought it would only be fair that I remind you how amazing you truly are in hopes you will never see yourself any differently as you get older.

All the love in the world,

Your big sis and best friend forever.

Jealousy.

It gets the best of us, doesn't it?

We live in this never-ending world filled with constant temptations; material, or not. I've been struggling with this lately- hard. That's the perfectionist in me- I want everything to be amazing. I want to take the best pictures, write the best stories, have the best career, raise the best family, look up to the best husband...I want my cooking to be delicious, my crafts to be precious, ok; the list goes on...

I know that as a woman of God though- my strength is constantly being tested. I often succumb to feelings of fear, worry, doubt, anger and jealousy. I get worried..."God, is THIS what you had planned for my life?" and then it starts a downward spiral of questioning.

I scroll through the most perfect blogs, look at people's perfect outfits, their fairytale marriages and relationships...Then I look at my messy hair, my make-up that got put on in my car on my way to work, and my relationships are...getting there.

I always, ALWAYS forget to just BE ME.

I know, we got this pounded into our heads as kids if we were lucky (which I was...encouraged to follow my dreams) But I get so consumed. With other people's perfect celebrations, their perfect hair, their perfect relationships, their perfect blog, their booming business, and then jealousy creeps up.......Awful.

Because I let other people define my self-worth.
 
I let people make me feel worthless. I let people make me feel like I don't deserve the truth. I let people make me feel like I am not worthy of loyalty. I let people make me feel depressed. I let people make me feel angry. I let people tell me who I am; and the WORST part of it....is that I usually believe it.

The key here....I LET PEOPLE.
ALL accountability lies within myself here.

Other people can only do to you what you ALLOW them to do. NOBODY chooses your actions, only yourself.

So to the eyes reading this right now- Do NOT let other people define WHO YOU ARE or HOW YOU ACT.

Ever.

Remember, you are fearfully and wonderfully made. In Christ. &&that should be enough for true happiness.

It doesn't matter if your blog is not the cutest, most revolutionary thing on Earth. It doesn't matter if you're not married yet. It doesn't matter if you are in a struggling relationship. It doesn't matter if you burn dinner every once in a while. It doesn't matter if you don't wake up every morning to your dream job....etc!

What DOES matter- is that you are being YOU. Because God designed each and every one of us to have a significant and unique purpose; and that purpose can only be fulfilled by....well, YOU!

I've reached a point where I just have to LET GO. Stop trying to be perfect and envious; and remember to view myself how God sees me. How he MADE me. If other people choose to make me feel differently, then they don't deserve a part in my life. They deserve love...but not to bring me down repetitively.

And if you stop looking at everyone else's "perfect" (it never actually is) life, then you will slowly begin to see yourself in the image of God. How He intended you to be. Not jealous of anything else. Not feeling unworthy. Not feeling depressed.....But feeling empowered by the fact that you are PERFECT in His eyes. &&He has a plan for you bigger than you could ever imagine.

Life is pretty darn great....and in the times when you get envious of what others may have, remember to count your blessings
&&JUST. BE. YOURSELF.

All else will come.
Be still.

With Love,

PhotoSoul Sarah.