I'm changing my middle name..

My middle name is Dawn. 

I have a tendency of searching for meaning in everything. Like, OMG, the guy at Starbucks totally put an "H," at the end of Sarah on my cup. What does that mean? 

...it means he wasn't an idiot and had two options to spell, "Sarah/Sara," ok?

I am queen of over analyzing; a curse and a blessing.

I've always been envious of those people who had this elaborate story to how they got their name. Better yet, a name that was passed down. My older sister got the middle name of, "Leigh," which was passed down for generations, and like many things I'm jealous of in my older sister, her middle name is certainly one of them.

My middle name is Dawn. Yes, I know it saves baby animals from oil spills and yes I know every rhyming word with it along with all the possible jingles you can use it in. It was my Mom's best friend's name for a big portion of her life; so there's not lost hope entirely for meaning. 

I think I've finally (after almost 24 yrs.) reached a conclusion on why my middle name will suffice. (These are the questions I mull over in my head for decades, people) 

Ah, the peace I've come to. 

"The night is always the darkest just before the Dawn." 

That's me! 

That's my middle name! 

In my life, I've gone through some dark stages, but more importantly, I hope to be the light. The dawn.

In my own life, in your life.

That annoying sunshine that creeps in when you're not ready but you love it anyways. 

Or, you know, that breath of fresh air after a long, heavy night of riding front row on the struggle bus. 

It's provided me with a constant reminder that no matter how hard life gets, the dawn will always come. We often focus so hard on weathering the storm that we don't know what to do when we get to the other side. But the dawn is coming, the ray of hope and sunshine will soon arrive. Keep holding on. 

So I guess I'm not changing my middle name, it's provided me enough meaning... For tonight. You can change yours though, Dawn suits you perfectly. ;) 

"The night is always darkest just before the Dawn, and I promise you, the Dawn is coming."